Rides in cars

I spend a great deal of time taking my children from place to place. Waiting to pick them up. Always keeping a full tank of gas because sometimes I won't have time to stop. Rides in the car always prove to be interesting with two teenagers. The music is loud. Everyone is trying to get the last word in. Today I was taking my daughter somewhere and out of the blue she asks me "mom why do girls hate how they look and wish they looked like someone else"? Well I am thinking this is one of those win or lose questions. I am thinking, trying to get the great mom answer and she continues. "I really don't want to look like anyone else I just want to be happy with me." How does a girl learn to happy with herself? I think she must have confidence in who she is not what she is. Some girls need a boyfriend to help them find a place, some girls need attention to feel worthy, some girls need sexy clothes, some need to bend the rules. Every girl has different needs. The scary thing is when that need betrays her safety. We mothers need to instill courage in our girls. We want our boys to be brave, but what about our girls? We need to encourage them to be strong. It isn't flattering to be unsure of what you will and will not do. We need to teach our girls that they have personal limits and when those limits are challenged they must know what to do. Always let your daughter know she can reach you, ask you anything, tell you anything, and know you want her to be safe. Help her see that your happiness is in knowing she is physically safe. It is hard to lock someone out if you never put up a door. So what about looking into the mirror and not liking what she sees? Help her see something everyday that is special and good about her. Notice things. Comment on the positive. Listen to her negative with understanding. Try to remember how it felt to be 13. Show her that her confidence can be that you will be there for her. As my mind is swirling getting my answer ready. I realize she is still talking. "Mom do you think I can make the soccer team? Next question please.