Taking down fences

It has occurred to me that true love is not about making someone do something they don't want to do. This realization is quite sobering; however, very real. Marriage is such a committment. As I have shared with you on previous blogs, I hear about every kind of relationship and marriage imaginable. The irony of love is that it cannot be forced, manipulated or controlled. True love is free. It wants the best for someone. It wants to give, forgive, respect, respond, be involved, and be free. People build fences to protect their children from running in the street, provide privacy, keep their dogs inside, offer added security. Fences in marriage cause real love to stagnate, die, and one starts looking for a way to fly over the top or dig underneath to escape. I don't want to build a fence. I want a full, green yard to run in, plant flowers, watch animals and see past my yard. I don't want to force someone to stay, to love me, to participate, to feel trapped, because this is not love, this is prison. Love is a desire to be complete, enough for one's self, that when with another, you are complemented not completed. If I am not complete, I will drain the other person. If I am not secure, there will be no trust. If I cannot be trusted to return, the other will hold on too tight and become exhausted. If love is not a free choice it is a chore. I don't want a fence to keep me out I want a love to set me free.