Tell the children the truth

My husband recently attended Bonnaroo, a musical festival that lasts all weekend, full of wildness, young people, beer, drugs, great music, and arts. He bought me a t-shirt that said, " one love, one people, one world." He really wanted to get me the one that said," tell the children the truth." I have thought about this statement many times since last weekend. Exactly what does this mean? Well, I will give you my Made Miriam definition. I can only give to you what has worked for me in my life. I know of parents who have sheltered their children from death. Children often handle the finality of life better than adults. Children want the facts not the fluff. Being able to process that someone will never come home rather than it being a choice to not come home. Trust is affected. If a child does not understand, then he or she forms conclusions, which may be far from what the truth really is. Without knowing what or how to question, a child will internalize certain feelings that become actions as an adult. Coping mechanisms develope that will make it difficult to form close, intimate relationships as a result of fear. Tell the children the truth. Today in our service, the speaker stated the fact that we parents are not perfect and our children know it better than anyone, so why not tell them. Why don't we offer our imperfections as stepping stones rather than stumbling blocks. Because we want to hold unto them. We want to nurse our poor choices and habits because they are convenient and comfortable. Children are looking for real stuff. Real life. Real consequences. They are looking for someone to tell it like it is and mean it when it is said. Today I heard that I can leave the same way I came or I can leave forever changed. I want the truth. I want to live the truth. Today on this Father's Day, I wonder, how many young people want to know the truth. They want to hear it, see it, and deal with it. Tell them we love them, then show it.