It's off to work I go.

I go back to work in the morning. 7 am to be exact. I have cried. I have wondered why. I have struggled with doing the right thing and here I am. I love my job as a surgical nurse, but while off I have learned what else I love. Peaceful no rushing mornings. Getting a chance to check in with our children before they leave for school. Enjoying breakfast with my family. Doing my 2 mile walk/run after everyone leaves for school. My kitchen cleaned up before the day starts. Supper planned for the evening. Laundry organized and bathrooms sparkling. When we women work outside the home, we learn what we can let go inorder to keep the essential stuff going. I am proud of my career in nursing, but the career of mothering is certainly the best and most rewarding and I have never once complained about my pay. For you see, the joy I have experienced during this time off cannot be compared to one's salary. I have been paid by the thankfulness of my children after eating a meal, having clean Under Armour for practice, not having to swap call to attend events, having less stress from feeling rushed. I will be glad to see my friends, comfort a scared patient, be prepared for a difficult case and enjoy carching up on the latest news from everyone. I will be sad. I will feel torn. But, I know I will be joining the millions of women who have felt much worst than myself and have much less to be thankful for. It's off to work I go, realizing that this summer was simply the most wonderful, unexpected pleasure and come to think of it....I remember crying when the doctor told me I couldn't work. Maybe just maybe wonderful, unexpected opportunities are waiting around the corner, but I've got to get out of the kitchen and find out.